It's Gettin A Little Drafty... (Part 2 of 4)

Last week I began a short blog series opening up about the amount of drafts I do (or try to do) for each writing project. I posted a short excerpt from the first draft of my upcoming novel, The Painted Lady (out in August). This week I'll post the second draft version of that same paragraph and explain what changed between the two.

First, here again is the first draft excerpt:

He stared across the table at the woman - this woman far too beautiful for him. This wasn't one of those instances where Miles was selling himself short; it's just that he wasn't naïve to the point that he didn't realize this. Around the restaurant he'd spotted numerous side-glances of the congratulatory kind - winks and nods - sent his way. Of these he was appreciative. It's always nice to know when people think the one you're with is more than decent enough on the eyes. And not just your own.

My first drafts are done based on a short outline that, more or less, keeps me in check. I don't plot the entire story but I need to know where I'm going so that, in the midst of discovery, I don't drift so far off course that I write myself into a corner and can't get back on track. At the same time I don't restrict myself, keeping outlines free to creatively explore whatever may pop up in the course of learning about my protagonist's situation. When I am doing the first draft I don't edit and I don't ever go back. I try to avoid anything that may stall progression. Occasionally in the second draft I run into inconsistencies in the shape of molehills or even huge mountains that I have to fix, but the first draft is essential. Or I should say finishing the first draft is essential. Mistakes can always be fixed in subsequent drafts.

Which is what I try to do with draft number two.

When it comes to the second draft I don't edit in screen; I retype the entire manuscript from page one using the printed out (and marked up) first draft as a guide, keeping only the bits of story that I feel are essential.

Now, here is the second draft version of the paragraph excerpt from above:

He stared across the table at the woman - this woman far too beautiful for him. This wasn't one of those instances where Miles was selling himself short; it's just that he wasn't naïve to the fact that he was the luckiest guy in Tony's Restaurant. If not the world. To further drive this point there were numerous sly glances of the congratulatory kind - winks and nods - fielding in his direction. Of these he was appreciative. It's always nice to know when people think the one you're with is more than decent enough on the eyes. And not just your own pair. Questionable attractiveness is subject to specific tastes. Real beauty is appreciated by all.

Okay, so where some areas of the paragraph have gotten a shot of more detail since the first draft, there's a bit too much embellishing going on here. And that happens. Second drafts, for me, are where the story really starts to come alive by adding/tweaking the right details that evoke a sense of realism (for example here: giving the restaurant a name). The fine line not to cross is where too many details take precedence and pull readers out of the story. But in the midst of draft two I go easy on myself because I know I have two more passes on the manuscript yet to do, and where draft two is about selecting what is essential to the story and focusing on it, draft three is really about honing that focus.

More about draft three coming up next.